Par for the Horse

I really like horse meat. Of course I didn’t know this until a few weeks ago but it has become apparent that we have all been eating rather a lot of it, and I can’t think of a meal I’ve found particularly disgusting recently. Therefore it stands to reason that I have probably finished off my horse lasagne/bolognese/soup with gusto.

I’m not really sure what all the fuss is about. I mean, if we suddenly found out that all horse meat was actually full of illegal lasagne would people be so bothered? I’m rather impressed by the extent of the problem actually. I like to think it even made it into the tin of dog food I served Nick last night.

My favourite development (though don’t tell Customs) is the apparent involvement of an international criminal gang of horse meat smugglers. What does one do with this information? Apart from question the European criminal underworld’s decision to move away from the horse’s head in your bed, and onto the entire horse in your stomach. I for one didn’t know whether to laugh, cry or make a quick phone call to make sure my horse was still alive. Well the latter obviously, but beyond that I really don’t know what to think.

As a solutions focused kind of guy, I’ve been considering ways we can make the whole thing a bit more positive. I think this is a golden opportunity to introduce a whole new range of horse-based dishes into our schools. What’s not to like – it’s cheap, nutritious and apparently really easy to get hold of. Step aside Jamie! Just because I haven’t got a run of incredibly successful cookbooks/TV shows/restaurants/food campaigns doesn’t mean I’m not allowed to contribute to the country’s food culture. Having said that, perhaps a cookbook isn’t a bad shout – it would certainly help tone down my bad-boy image. How about ‘Horsing Around with Dave Cameron’? Fantastic.

Whatever the result, at least no one can say this is my fault. What a strange yet pleasant feeling.

Dave

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27 thoughts on “Par for the Horse

  1. Horse’s head in your bed?…I’m thinking of the Godfather here..

  2. mdprincing says:

    may see an increase in hoof and mouth disease…..anyone? ….Im hear all night

  3. rossmurray1 says:

    Deftly played, good sir.

  4. if horse was sold in the shops, i would buy it,
    if shepherds pie is spose to be lamb and cottage pie is beef, what should we call it if it was sold legally with horse?

  5. Louise says:

    Love it! And don’t mind horsemeat either.

  6. DrFrood says:

    Dude, seriously, you’ve no idea how difficult it is to sneak a decrepit thoroughbred in your hand luggage.

  7. Dave i’d really appreciate your thoughts on the coming year that aren’t horse related.

    Im a uni student given the task of analysing everyday conflicts and i’m sure you’ve got plenty of thoughts on the issue…

    http://jessicawhybrow.wordpress.com/

    Lovin your work btw.

  8. cosmatus says:

    good idea man

  9. Clever title to your cookbook. :) Enjoyed your post. :)

  10. yuck, horse meat..

  11. Mike says:

    Page 7…Horses Ass Madras w/- Cameroon Nuts (Acknowledgement: Rebecca Brooks)

  12. susielindau says:

    Isn’t that discrimination some how? We don’t have a problem eating cows, but we eat horses and it is like cannibalism. Our collective minds flash to all the great Western movies and pony rides as a kid.
    Note tone of sarcasm. Thought I would add that since you don’t know me from Adam!
    Congrats on your Freshly Pressage!

  13. themword1 says:

    Great post!
    I love your solution. It is true what you – this meat hasn’t harmed anyone. The only problem has been from the retailers and suppliers. I think consumers like to point the finger as I have mentioned in my blog I have written on the issue.

    I would love to hear your opinion, I a, currently blogging on conflict and would appreciate your thoughts on this issue –

    http://themword1.wordpress.com/2013/02/12/bucked-off/

  14. Eagle Tech says:

    Perhaps you could a horse curry in your cookbook. I’m quite partial to lamb curry, Maybe something like that. We already have foods named after people. Oysters Rockefeller. Eggs Benedict. Why not a horse meat curry called Curry Cameron?

  15. I wonder if horse meat is low in calories and lean. Who knows, maybe Lean Cuisine and Weight Watchers has been using horse meat for years. Funny blog!

  16. Thom Topham says:

    Horseome Dave! With all your gay friends getting married and what have you, you’ll obviously be aware of Horse Meat Disco, a gay ‘beat’ club in South London that’s popular with ‘bears’ (fat, hairy blokes-with-beards)? All this horsing around is really good publicity for them eh? Tally Ho! Thom X

  17. Miss Misfit says:

    Funny thoughts… funnier thought– I do not want to eat something that I ride… er…

  18. [...] Par For The Horse: Centaur Golf: THE SPORT OF THE FUTURE. [...]

  19. Jessica says:

    It’s nice to see a politician just telling it like it is.

  20. interesting post :)

  21. […] the runaway success of my first cook book (Horsing Around with Dave Cameron – read all about it here), I’m feeling the urge to write a second. I’m thinking something along the lines of ‘What’s […]

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